Everything by: Heath Parker Lail
Hullo again, everyone. It is good to be here again...in fact, it is good to be whole again, with no stress pushing down upon me. It feels good to not be "forced" to be anywhere at any given time...I haven't been this free since I graduated high school in 2000, and even then I was working a full schedule at Star Foods that summer, and started college in the fall so I guess I wasn't really free at all, huh? :) Thing is, I'm tired. Really tired...mentally, physically and spiritually, it took my all this semester to finish. If I had failed, I really don't think I could have gone on, knowing that I would have to face another semester of books, exams and long drives. There comes a time in all things we do, whether it be work or play, when we are simply tapped out and are running on fumes. I have been there for at least 6 months, if not longer. Now perhaps I may receive a full night's rest, one complete with rest, rather than simply lying in bed going over my faults as a friend and lover to those who count upon me daily rather than sleeping.
In fact, I think I will go ahead and turn in now, so that I am well-rested in the AM for my trip to Oxford, to drop off a library book and pick up my cap/gown. Thank you once again for all those who have stood behind me all these years, pushing me onward. Thank you Samantha for your years of friendship and love--would I could go back and love you as I might have, but alas simply 'twas not to be. I am happy for you though, as you have found one who showed you that love first, without multiple foolish mistakes. Should you not be able to attend the ceremony, I understand. You have other important obligations in your life currently, and I would not take you away from them though your presence will be sorely missed. Shauna, thank you for righting me on my path, though it was but only a short time of our entire time together. I did love you, and I wish you nothing but happiness though you tore my heart in half. May you find whatever it is you seek, child...and may God follow you in that search for without Him, none may survive one hour, much less a day or week. Brooke...there are no words for what you have done in my life. You have been an invaluable ally through multiple rough seas, and I trust your counsel to be sage and wise. May you find God one day, for once you do, your light will shine as a beacon in the darkest of nights. How I know this, you ask? Because you follow your heart and its desires 100 percent, and if you were to find God, you would follow Him 100 percent. To all the others who have stood with me these years...a heartfelt thank you. God Bless and G'night.
H
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